Mothering tip #62: lie*.
Jedi is a gullible sort. I say that with all the love in the world, but he’s willing to fall for anything. I could tell him marshmallows were raining from the sky and he’d peer out the window, bowl in hand. Now if we were kind parents, we probably wouldn’t exploit this as often as we do. Obviously, we are not kind parents.
We are cruel, cruel parents.
As a recent example, this past weekend, as we were putting on pants for dinner at grandma and grandpa’s, Jedi asked where we were going. Knowing his penchant for complaining (newsflash: 5 year old’s are opinionated), I figured I would give him a more worthwhile cause to bemoan. Because I’m helpful. And a little perspective builds character.
We told him we were going to the doctor. For a shot or two.
He ran throughout the house screaming and whining and flailing, avoiding his pants at all costs. Of course, we told him the truth shortly after. If only because taking him over in just Spiderman underwear may have been an entirely different experience. Compared to a needle-wielding doctor visit though, a bit of time with the grandparents seems like Christmas.
*It should be noted this only applies while the child is still too young to call you on it.