Research
March 17 2010 Most of the keyword searches people find this site by are fairly benign and uninteresting. I prefer it this way. There was one time when I wrote about my son running around without any pants on and consequently garnered many “little boy nudist” searches that completely creeped me out.
Which, I probably just subjected myself to again. Only, gotcha! Haha! This post has nothing to do with nudists of any sort. Please go away, creepy pervert.
Most people actually come here looking for, of all things, “kid things”. I know, shocking. There was one search recently, however, that got my attention and I thought I’d address, as a favor to those who may happen to stumble by looking for the same advice. A sampling of “things kids do wrong”, per my 6 years of experience so far:
- pick their nose, then hand you the booger
- attempt swirling any number of body parts in the toilet
- stick small objects in electrical outlets
- slam doors when others are sleeping
- wipe their hands everywhere except on a napkin
- scream at the top of their lungs, right in your ear
- throw tantrums of epic proportions over something ridiculous like socks
- completely destroy a room 10 seconds after you’ve cleaned it
- pelt hard plastic toys at your head
- try to run off into oncoming traffic
If you have any to add, please feel free. All in the name of helpful research. For a true sappy disclaimer, however, I must admit that even though kids do some things wrong, they’re also lovely little beings that do many things right. Although, in all honesty, if you need to Google for examples then I would have to say you are the one doing it wrong.
11 Responses
on March 17 2010
It is weird what drives people to you. I used to check pretty regularly, but not so much anymore. I once mentioned in passing something about someone getting a boob job (Britney??) and I got more hits off that than you could even imagine.
on March 17th, 2010
@jesser, I probably check way more than I should. It fascinates me.
on March 17 2010
“Although, in all honesty, if you need to Google for examples then I would have to say you are the one doing it wrong.” — Hysterical!
The strangest search terms I ever got was actually just a week or so ago, and was something along the lines of “what do i need in my diaper bag?” I have no idea why or how that particular search brought them to my blog, though!
My son has never swirled a body part in the toilet, but I did catch him using my HAIRBRUSH to stir the toilet water. He grinned up at me and told me he was “cooking.” Grrrrr…
.-= Crystal @ Semi-Crunchy Mama´s latest blog post: Eight Years Ago =-.
on March 17th, 2010
@Crystal @ Semi-Crunchy Mama, Buzz likes to try to stick his foot and/or head in the toilet. This is partly why potty-training is so gosh darn fun!
on March 17 2010
Yes to your entire list! And I would add: go to great lengths to snag glass jars off grocery store shelves and chuck them on the floor.
PS: How can you tell what people search for when they end up at your blog? (Novice, anyone??)
.-= Stacia´s latest blog post: Smile for Me =-.
on March 17th, 2010
@Stacia, You have to have a statcounter of some sort installed. I use statcounter.com. Since you’re hosted on wordpress, though, I’m not sure which are allowed.
on March 17 2010
@stacia, try Google Analytics. More info. than you can shake a stick at.
One of my most frequent search terms is, “how to irritate your teacher.” Makes me proud.
on March 17 2010
Great list! You are so funny lady. I would have to add one: begins a discussion about poop, pee, butt or penis when you are out in public. Maybe that’s not wrong, but it’s always funny.
on March 18 2010
How about pelt hard things at expensive electronics? I think I found that more upsetting than my head. (I can duck but the TV couldn’t)
Or licks food off the table when company is over. That was nice too.
.-= Marilyn @ A Lot of Loves´s latest blog post: Makeover!! : Wednesday of Few Words =-.
on March 18th, 2010
@Marilyn @ A Lot of Loves, Thankfully, my kids have yet to throw things at the TV. If they did, we’d probably kill ‘em. Because yes, that would be WAY MORE upsetting than my head.
on March 18 2010
I’m pretty sure you got the most important ones listed.