On Finally Asking for Help

Buzz is a rambunctious sort of fellow. I’ve mentioned this before, it’s nothing new. I truly don’t believe he’s a devil-child, even though I’ve called him that before. He’s curious and testing. He wants to be everywhere, get into everything, he doesn’t mind a word I say. It’s difficult to get him focused, it’s even harder to keep his attention.

To be honest, I’m not sure if this is just a trait of 4 year old’s, or if it only seems worse because it’s my son. Except I don’t see any of the other neighborhood kids his age dart off into the middle of the street and away from their flailing mothers, is what I’m saying.

He’s the same way at his speech class. His teacher tries to get him involved in a game, and he’d rather climb into their toy cabinet. She wants him to relay the actions of flash cards, but he’s already distracted by a bucket of crayons. He gets a puzzle out, only to be done with it two seconds later.

His teacher is a nice girl, she never gets loud or seems impatient with him. They play together well, and Buzz is excited to see her. But he doesn’t learn a lot this way. He’s such a sweet, good boy when he wants to be. That’s the thing, though. When he wants to be.

The last time we were there, she mentioned, “I was thinking, maybe it’d be good to get an Occupational Therapist in here, to asses his needs. Maybe they can come up with ways to get him to focus more?”

What I heard: “Your kid is too much and I need help.”

I don’t blame her. In fact, I’m actually surprised it took this long. Most days, I feel like I’d appreciate some help with him, too.



17 Responses

  1. 1

    I encourage you to seek out some professional perspective. It could be something, or it could be absolutely nothing. I took my oldest to a child therapist because he was struggling at preschool, had issues with impulse control.

    In my case, the therapist indicated that boys age and mature more slowly than girls and impulse control is one of the number one things that boys struggle with. The time with the therapist put my mind at ease – my kid was on the extreme end of the spectrum, and it took until he was in 4th or 5th grade to really handle his impulse control issues, but it’s now a distant memory.
    Cathy @ All I Want To Say’s latest post: top ten realizations from NYC

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Cathy, When the opportunity is presented, I absolutely plan on letting them assess the situation and give him whatever help necessary. The more help the better could be my motto. Both for his therapy sessions and in life.

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Cathy, Though I should have added, the fact that you said I may have to deal with this until my son is in 4th or 5th grade is enough to make me break out in hives.

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  2. 2

    You should absolutely take advantage of any and all services available! That’s what our tax dollars are supposed to do–and I think it’s never a bad idea to get another perspective, you know?

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @TheKitchenWitch, Absolutely! Bring on the help! Can the help come home with me, too?

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  3. 3
    jesser says:

    I think I would probably interpret it in exactly the same way and freak out at least a bit if I were in your shoes, but what it really means (something I’d only come to after loads of grumping and ranting and bemoaning and probably crying) is that he’s getting extra help. He may or may not need it, but it probably can’t hurt. Honestly, he sounds like a typical little kid to me!

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @jesser, A lot of how he acts does sound typical, it’s just excessive, it seems. But you’re right, the help can’t hurt.

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  4. 4

    He sounds so much like my own son. He’s just always doing his own thing and his teachers have asked me to tell him to use his “listening ears” at preschool. Well okay then. Does that actually work with other kids? It doesn’t work with mine.

    I think it would be interested to hear what an Occupational Health assessment would say. If they have ideas on how to help him focus more that can only be a good thing. For everyone.
    Marilyn (A Lot of Loves)’s latest post: Show Me The Pumpkin- Wednesday of Few Words

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Marilyn (A Lot of Loves), If your son even knows what listening ears are, then you’ve already got one up on me.

    Can you imagine the fun we’d have if we got our 2 sons together? Ha.. ha… yeah, now that I think about it, let’s never get them together.

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  5. 5
    Aging Mommy says:

    I agree with TKW – take advantage of this offer, let the occupational therapist see your son but tell them you want a complete assessment and follow-up meeting to see what they have to say.
    Aging Mommy’s latest post: One Shot Wednesday

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Aging Mommy, Absolutely, bring on the help! I know we need it. Plus, we’ve been going to this place long enough that I trust their opinion.

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  6. 6
    Mrs.Mayhem says:

    It couldn’t hurt to have an evaluation. There is no harm in listening to the specialist’s perspective and then deciding what you think would be best for your son.

    REPLY

    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Mrs.Mayhem, You’re absolutely right, thank you!

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  7. 7
    Krystyn says:

    I say take advantage of the services offered..they might be able to offer you suggestions, too:)

    PS My child sometimes forgets herself and darts off, too!
    Krystyn’s latest post: Show me your best Dinosaur PSF

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 29th, 2010

    @Krystyn, Oh if that were the case, but no. My son apparently just finds it funny when I have to chase after him. I’ve tried not chasing, but then he just keeps on running. In the middle of the street. Not good.

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  8. 8

    What I heard: “Your kid is too much and I need help.” — My heart broke for you when I read this! This isn’t the case, not at all.

    I used to teach preschool, 3- & 4-year-olds, and more often than not, the boys took longer to develop impulse control than girls the same age. There’s such a wide range of what is considered “normal.” Definetely take advantage of the services offered — an evaluation by an occupational therapist will provide both you and Buzz’s teacher with more techniques in which to help teach Buzz how to channel his energy.
    Crystal @ Semi-Crunchy Mama’s latest post: this moment

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    From: C. (Kid Things)
    on October 30th, 2010

    @Crystal @ Semi-Crunchy Mama, I love your comments, I want to tell you that first. Because I truly do. Thank you for this. Maybe it’s because you were a preschool teacher, so you know, but it made me feel a heap lighter the instant I read it. It’s just days with Buzz can be, well, they can be a lot to deal with it.

    I do plan on accepting any and all help that comes our way, absolutely. I feel we could use it.

    Thanks again. I read all the comments you left today and I appreciate every one. Especially with so much going on yourself.

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