Is This Considered a Trick or a Treat?

October 31 2011

Posted in: Daily · Tags: boys, Jedi, of course

The kids have been staying with their dad over this four day extended weekend. While I was slightly disappointed that I wouldn’t get to see them in their Halloween costumes tonight, I quickly got over it when I realized I wouldn’t have to drag them around trick or treating.

Then this happened. When it was clear someone finally decided to cut me a break.

About an hour into their drive to his house, still in the car, their dad called to ask, “Did you pack any extra pants for Jedi?”.

“Extra pants?”, I wondered. What kind of question is that? “Uh, yeah, he has a couple pairs in his bag. Why?”

With a sigh in his voice, he retold the horror. “Well, he was trying really hard to push out a fart and…”

“Oh, yuck!”, I interrupted, knowing where this was going. Then burst into laughter. “I’m glad it’s you and not me! Oh… wait”, I paused, lowering my voice. “I think I forgot to pack him any underwear.”

“You forgot to pack his underwear?”, he repeated, a disbelieving tone in his voice.

“What? I had a lot to do this morning!”, I said, still laughing.

Apparently, that one accident in the car was a prelude for the full blown unpleasantness that erupted by the time evening rolled around. With no choice of clean underwear, but plenty of pants. Of course I don’t want to see my son in any kind of distress, but I can’t help but feel this is a small turn of kismet. Because with all the shit I put up with, it’s nice to know he’s dealing with a bit of it, too.

Colors of This Rainbow

October 28 2011

Posted in: Daily · Tags: good, life

Red: My current toenail polish. The kids’ tricycle that each has zoomed on, starting when Jedi was a toddler. A Connect 4 chip. Buzz’s Power Ranger toothbrush. A bloody lip one acquired from another. My heart, for them. Also my head exploding after a long day.

Yellow: 4 rubber ducks in their bath. The glorious sight of the school bus. Spongebob. Frozen waffles, breakfast of champions. No. 2 pencils. Falling leaves taking over our yard.

Brown: Beloved teddy bear. Lion, too. Cafe mocha pick-me-up. The color of Abby’s favorite pants. The frames holding cherished pictures lining these walls. Chocolate ice cream.

Green: The Incredible Hulk. A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Buzz dressed up as either or both. The quilt on my bed. A shade of Abby’s eyes. The I’ve been a good kid at school stamp.

Blue: The color of boys. Literally, sparkling back in Jedi’s gaze. Though mine, too. Pajamas. Abby’s markered fingernails that won’t wash off. Our carpet, here. A plastic whale of a spoon. Sully, from Monsters Inc, what we’re watching while I’m writing this.

Purple: Abby’s Princess nightgown. Our living room curtains, a more subdued, almost burgundy, shade. One of many scattered crayons. The sunset, bedtime near. The smallest bruise from rough and tumble play.

Pink: Princesses. Dolls. A Tinkerbell dress, complete with tutu. My little girl, a speed of feist. Headbands and hair clips, she’ll take out as soon as I put in.

These are the colors of my life. My rainbow.

Finding a Shirt to Wear

October 27 2011

Posted in: Me Myself · Tags: life, of course

I needed a shirt to wear.

As most mothers know, however, this isn’t as easy as it sounds. Shirts have a timeline of stains telling the years down the front or have holes in the arm pit of all places. I’m not looking to win a style icon award, just to step into public without being gawked at. Comfortably decent, if you will. I’m really very easy to please.

I know I have something here to wear.

I dug through my drawer, disgusted not only at the mess I was making but at the little options I found. It shouldn’t be this hard to find your standard issue clean shirt.

Then, I came across an army green tee. Not the most attractive option, but an old stand-by. One that has been with me for many, many years. It’s been showing its age, noticeably worn with a few discolored spots, but reliably passable. It would do when the only necessity is to be concealed. I slipped it over my head without a hitch and pulled it down.

But something wasn’t right, I noticed immediately. It gave more than it should. Along with that, there was a draft. I felt shockingly exposed. I looked down, and oh, hello. There was a giant rip stretching around my shirt, making me an unwilling participant in a bad game of peek-a-boob. Well, I can’t go out like that.

It made the arm pit holes not look so bad after all.

Back to square one.

I needed a shirt to wear.

Smurfette

October 25 2011

Posted in: The Kids · Tags: Abby, of course

With a drawing tablet and handful of markers, Abby disappeared into the bedroom. A while later, Jedi got off the computer and went to find his sister to play. He found her all right. Then came in and said in an alarmed tone, “Abby’s colored herself blue, I don’t want to play with her like that”.

Assuming she maybe marked a bit on her hands, it wouldn’t be the first time Jedi overreacted, I didn’t heed his warning right away. Because it couldn’t be that bad. Whatever it is, it washes off. “Is it just on her?”, I made sure to ask him, because I’d hate to have to wash the bed sheets or scrub color off the wall. “Yes”, he replied. Nothing to concern myself over then, so I thought.

Abby finally emerged after a few more minutes passed. Vibrantly illustrating why I should have went back to check on her.

For once, Jedi was not overreacting. She was blue. Blue as blue can be.

Smurfette blue.

I tried to scrub it off with a sponge, but it was a futile effort. It was on her face, she gave herself a mustache, all over legs, the bottom of her feet, arms, hands. You name it, she covered it with gusto. She had markered herself so extensively that I could do nothing else than give her an impromptu bath. And I was worried about washing bed sheets.

As I set my Smurf in the tub, the abundance of pigment began to rinse off of her like a backwards Easter egg. It was so plentiful that it even turned the water around her a stunning shade of ultramarine. One more memory I have to fondly recall. “Remember when you were 3 and turned yourself blue? Good times.”

When Time is a Factor

October 24 2011

Posted in: The Kids · Tags: Buzz, Jedi, school

Last week were the boys’ parent teacher conferences, where I also received their report cards. This mostly solidified what I already knew. Buzz is a great kid but has issues and we’re waiting on his evaluations to proceed to the next step that would be a better fit, and Jedi is incredibly smart. He’s on top in every subject and likes to participate in his 2nd grade class.

There is one problem, however.

In math, they have tests that must be completed to move on to the next level. These are timed. I think it’s 3 minutes to finish 42 problems. As his teacher remarked, he knows the answers. But the time aspect stresses him out.

It was the same last year. It’s all in his head, something that I believe he just needs to work past.

His teacher, however, suggested that we could look into getting an IEP (individual education plan). Instead of finding a solution to calm the stress the clock presents, we’d eliminate it entirely.

Um, huh?

I realize his teacher was merely offering suggestions that might help, but I don’t see how this does. Maybe I’m being too hard on my son because I know what he can do and how he is. He’s an exaggerated, dramatic boy who’s beyond his years in intelligence. There are some kids that really need an IEP. Buzz is one of them. Then there are those like Jedi, who don’t. He has no issues that require special treatment. I’m more inclined to tell him to just get over it, because in my opinion, and in my heart, there is no need to let a perfectly capable child skirt the system. It may be beneficial to him for the immediate now, but it won’t be in the long run. It seems like a ridiculous idea to even consider.

Or is it? Am I wrong here?