From the Planet of the North Pole

December 02 2009 · comment 1 Comment
Posted in: The Kids · Tags: , ,

Barely the start of the Christmas season and the feel-good movies are already airing in full swing. Just this week alone we’ve watched Santa Buddies, Jingle All The Way, Elf, more elves, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas, as well as The Santa Clause 1 and 2. I have Christmas spirit seeping from my pores.

The Santa Clause was especially perplexing for Jedi, who likes to have an explanation for life’s every quandary. As Tim Allen began to transform into the jolly bearded man in red, Jedi looked at me with wide eyes and asked “but why did he get to turn into Santa?”.

Since I didn’t want to ruin the holiday spirit by saying that the original Santa fell off his roof and died, I made up a quick tale about how he was always meant to be Santa, he just had to wait for the right time to show his true self.

“So he’s been disguised as a human?”, Jedi pondered, curiously.

“Santa’s always been human”, I replied, stifling a smile.

“And the elves?”, he wondered.

“They’re human, too”, I answered. “Just little.”

Maybe this is why he has screamed bloody murder whenever we’ve tried to sit him on a mall Santa’s lap in the past; he’s had it in his head that Father Christmas is some kind of alien. A rosy-cheeked alien who carries a big bag of toys, encouraged along by his pointy-eared, curly-toed helpers. I can understand how that might appear terrifying.

A Style of His Own

December 01 2009 · comment 4 Comments
Posted in: The Kids · Tags: , ,

Abby has been in desperate need of winter clothing. She’s been wearing the same size too small pair of pink pants and purple Sesame Street hoodie since the cold weather struck. All of her dresses are summer style, and it doesn’t matter how ridiculously adorable the outfit is, short sleeves won’t cut it when it’s snowing.

J ventured out on Black Friday. Not super crazy at 5 a.m., but crazy enough at 10. Along with the first few Christmas presents of the season, which is another entry unto itself since we are the Kingdom of Procrastination, he bought Abby a couple of much needed winter dresses. Just the fact that he is trying to purchase a girl some clothes is enough to sound the alarms.

He called, wondering what size he should get. I told him. When he called back a few minutes later, on his way to a different store, I asked if the dresses came with tights or leggings. He said no. I asked if he could try to find some. Again, bare legs might be a little cold when it’s snowing.

When he returned home alive and intact from the Black Friday madness, I inspected his purchases. The dresses were surprisingly nice. One red, one black. Both simple corduroy with classic flower embroidery by the bottom hem. The red one will look cute for Christmas.

The leggings, though. They’re bad. Let’s put it this way; Abby, I’m going to go ahead and apologize for your father’s fashion blunders now. You should see how he tries to dress your brothers sometimes. We’ll be on the lookout for leggings or tights that aren’t psychedelic, and maybe even match, hopefully before the first snowfall.

Lights

November 30 2009 · comment 5 Comments
Posted in: Daily · Tags: , ,

Every year before Christmas, we load everybody into the car and head off in search of festively decorated houses. J and I used to do this when it was only the two of us, those days long ago. It was a lot quieter then. It’s a lot more fun now.



We’ll go back out again when it feels more like Christmas. Last night was just a teaser.

Bitter Berries

November 27 2009 · comment 6 Comments
Posted in: Daily · Tags: , ,

Our first hosted Thanksgiving dinner wasn’t nearly the chaotic catastrophe I had envisioned. The turkey was done with plenty of time to spare, the stuffing was delicious and inhaled. A few other dishes didn’t turn out quite like I had hoped, but nothing was disastrous.

We even managed to keep our good humor in check. For the most part. Strangely, our one argument throughout the day involved the cranberries. Not a recipe regarding fresh cranberries, because that might make a little more sense. No, my family is the simple sort who prefers the canned variety. We weren’t even adding anything extra to it. In fact, I don’t even like cranberries.

No, we argued on how to present the cranberries. And it wasn’t really an argument, it was a “this is my way” “well, I don’t like your way”, kind of thing.

Maturity, people. We own it in abundance.

J believes that once free from the can, the cylindrical cranberry gelatin should be sliced into wobbly circles. I didn’t realize this. My mom never sliced hers; she simply opened a can, put it in a bowl, smushed it up. Voila! Thanksgiving side dish staple at it’s finest. I was even laughing at how ridiculously lazy the whole thing was. That’s when I began to smush. And J began to wrinkle his nose.

You’re kidding me, right? I’m storming out of the room over cranberries? I DON’T EVEN LIKE CRANBERRIES. Stupid cranberries.

Other than that, dinner went off without a hitch. I wish we had a bigger table, but we managed. Our pleasantries returned, the food was good, conversations were loud, and the bowl of smushed cranberries was heartily devoured.

Maybe We Should Just Order Pizza Instead

November 25 2009 · comment 6 Comments
Posted in: Daily · Tags: , ,

For the very first time, we are hosting Thanksgiving dinner.

(Insert insane laughter here.)

In our teeny tiny house. At our teeny tiny dinner-for-4 table. In our teeny tiny kitchen. With teeny tiny children running underfoot. Wearing our teeny tiny, miniscule even, chefs hats. We have never cooked a whole turkey before. Hell, we’ve never cooked a whole chicken before.

This should be interesting.

(Insert more insane laughter.)

I know they say it’s not about the food, it’s about the family. But my family really likes their food. Thankfully, my husband is going to help. He will be the one to wrestle the bird. He is also going to remove the giblets, because ew. We have a general idea of the sides we’re going to prepare. We’ve planned this far. The end result is a whole nother story. We have extras of everything possible for experimental purposes and/or in case of a catastrophe. Unfortunately, there is only one turkey.

This could go one of two ways: either not that bad, or it’s all gonna blow to pieces. Honestly, my vote is for the latter. Both J and myself tend to become overwhelmed easily. Put us fretting in a teeny tiny kitchen, fighting for space if not our lives, and our marriage may be at stake. At least I should get a good story out of it.

Pray for us.